Spurs were bounced out of the competition 4-0 on aggregate after losing 3-0 in Germany this week.
De Jong says Spurs boss Jose Mourinho needs to take some of the blame - but the players also shouldn't escape scrutiny.
He said, "We can blame Mourinho, but you have to look further back.
"There were already a lot of players who did not want to run, who did not give everything for the shirt. So it is not that Mourinho is the only one responsible because he is the coach. Yes, he is also responsible, but the responsibility lies mainly with the players.
"The players have to do much better, they have to put their heads together. If there is no one on the team who shows leadership, put them in their place and say, 'Listen, what you have done today is ridiculous and shameful...'
"When I watched the game today I couldn't name a single name of Tottenham who was a leader. Hugo Lloris was captain of course but he is not a fielder. Lloris is a goalkeeper, he can only exercise a limited influence."