A lack of big game opportunities led Tottenham striker Jermain Defoe to consider his future at White Hart Lane. The England international, who scored his first Premier League goals of the campaign in Sunday's draw with Wolves, is hoping to play a part against AC Milan on Wednesday night.
He told the Daily Mail: "It's been hard. You start to think: 'What am I doing here?' I'm used to playing in big games.
"I've played in big games for my clubs and for my country.
"It'll be a tough game (against Milan). I hope I'm playing and if I can score and win the game then it'll be great.
"But I remember playing against Charlton (in the FA Cup in January) and scoring two goals, then the next weekend I missed out.
"I was upset about that because once I start scoring I'm confident and I have the feeling I know I'll score in the next game. We played Manchester United and I thought, 'I'm playing', but I didn't start."
"I don't think the club would have allowed me to go on loan. But it was like when I decided to leave here and went to Portsmouth because I got to a situation where I thought: 'I'm not sitting on the bench.'"